Pillaging and Plundering for Good Booty

Ahoy me hearties! I'm back, with a clean poop deck and padded treasure chest, looking for a buccaneer with a robust booty to flog this yo-ho-ho before shivering me timbers with a jolly roger.

Au Naturale

Beauty: Screw laser hair removal!

Beast: Yeah! Wait, we're talking just for me though, right? Because you've got a little 'stashe going that I could live without. 

Beauty: Sure honey, because I'm actually loving raking my hands through your back fur.

Beast: So, all this time you've been lying to me?

Beauty: No, I really dreamed of bedding Chewbacca over Han Solo. Because the 7-foot-tall Wookiee was the hot one.

Beast: But Mom always said Chewbacca was...oh, I get it now.

Beauty: Moms fib. Life's a bitch.

Beast: I hope my job at the Empire is still available.

Read My Lips

Shut up, this totally worked for Georgia O'Keefe.

Bag Your Face

Remember when Samantha donned a getup like this on Sex and the City? While it was kind of shitty of her to upstage Carrie's book-release party by parading around in her sexy-priest costume when the invitation clearly stated an urban casual dress code, the outfit did prove it's possible to get a nip and a tuck and still hit the streets for cocktail hour. Cheers!

Yo Ho Ho and a Jacket of Booty

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Arrgh. If only me jewelry box were a wee bigger, I wouldn't have to carry around me entire earring collection.