Cutting Edge in 2001

Left Pucker: Omigod, I can't believe I was selected to be in such an edgy campaign!

Right Pucker: I know! Nobody's ever tried a lipstick-lesbian kiss to sell product before. This is so edgy!

Left Pucker: I might be into it a little more if your mouth didn't smell like the ass of a rotting cow.

Right Pucker: Me? Do you know what happens when you combine coffee, cigarrettes and roasted-garlic hummus? I do, because it's burning a hole though my chin.

Token Male: I don't care about the smell. I want in the middle of that brownie delight!

Red Wonder: I'm too busy trying not to pass out from the stench to hear you.

Pink Princess: So glad I learned how to stop breathing at Barbizon Modeling School.

Paris Bueller's Day Off

Hey, Bitches! It's me. Paris! Bet you couldn't tell because I replaced my hair extensions with a Marilyn Monroe wig. Don't I look just like her? I was so turned on I almost made out with myself, but that stupid mirror wouldn't let me reach in and wrap my arms around my own hot body. When is somebody going to design a make-out mirror already? And don't my boobs look huge? Who would have guessed duct tape has more uses than keeping the help in line? I learned SO much on this photo shoot!